Things I Learned in English 316

My professor for my technical writing course last semester has ADHD, and he's great. This is a selection of things he's gone off topic about in class (representing about four lectures of tangents):

• Robert Frost, TS Elliott, and Shakespeare. Specifically, several poems and soliloquies recited from memory, and what they said about death and suicide. "LIFE IS MEANINGLESS!"
• How to troubleshoot your vintage Volkswagen Bug when it breaks down on your way to ski at Snowbird for $7. "So the damn thing stopped."
• A class poll was taken to see how many people would be in favor of caffeinated beverages on campus. "I have a 12-pack of Diet Coke in my office."
• Whether girls are really less shallow than guys, since they don't like to date men who are shorter than them.
• Why his high school typing teacher was terrible, and how he had to take shorthand from her the next semester.
• How he got into college without taking the ACT or the GRE.
• A story about how he got "fired" from piano lessons at the age of 6, and no piano teacher in his town would take him on. "I thought it was great."
• "This is a book I wrote about the history of prostitution..."
• An explanation of how he's trying to cut down on swearing, except "damn" and "hell," which are in the Bible.
• "Donald Trump just needs to grow up and realize he doesn't have any hair."
• An explanation of how the word "bitching" has become more pejorative today than when he was our age.
• "This is a picture of my foot in Moab..."
• Diet Coke has a distinct smell compared to Pepsi, which is crap.
• A detailed description of which documents he prefers to type and which he prefers to write by hand.
• How is Keith Richards still alive with all the drugs he uses?
• He's not afraid of bears, is totally fine with being 20-30 yards from a bear, but flying terrifies him.
• Different types of old guns and how they work.
• Different types of trees.
• Different types of women's hairstyles.
• Different types of mud.
• Different types of deer.
• The cost of parking in Seattle (which is apparently Bernie Sanders' fault).
• How complicated recycling is (also Bernie Sanders' fault).
• The merits of Orrin Hatch, who has never changed his mind about anything in his life.
• How he bought a cherry pitter from a State Fair and couldn't figure out the instructions to assemble it.
• How carburetors work, and how to maintain them in old cars.